I thought I would use this opprotunity to really give you an in depth analysis of the answers to these questions. Well actually, the last question, I can answer the first two questions easily.
Finding him is half the challenge as his location is a secret only solved through the following riddle:
"Come find me in a place of rock and bird, where Big Beef and Cheddar is procured!"
This of course refers to the dumpster behind the Arby's on Rockville Pike. Come on people, stay with me here. Now, Shecky is one tough customer so you always need to be prepared with "comedy" weapons that include the following:
1.) Fake Clown Nose
And of course,
3.) A Gun.
Now, once you have overcome Shecky, he is obliged to give you three jokes on the topics of your choosing so its best to think carefully. The first time I beat Shecky down I said the following,
"Give me a joke about Oprah!"
"What is an Oprah?"
Thus began the long process of informing Shecky who Oprah was, what her relevance was to the world, and so on and so forth. Shecky then replied:
"Oprah's thin, then she's fat, its almost like she's on Weight Watchers in reverse! Eh? Eh?"
It was time to beat Shecky more severely this time. The trick to this cave troll is that he supplies comedy to everyone so the harder you pummel him, the better your jokes will be. After explaining the premise of the Wizard of Oz to Shecky, he supplied me with my, now legendary, "Wizard of Oz bit" after he was done spitting out his molars.
So remember, if you want to be a stand up comedian just like your old pal Evan, find Shecky and beat him mercilessly for jokes.