Evan's Lessons from the Weekend!

Good morning Tales of a Gangly Bastard readers. Hope everyone had a nice and good weekend. Mine was quite long and relaxing for the most part. It was also very informative. I learned a number of things.

1.) The last thing that you ever want to say to a police officer is, "I'm going for your weapon!" This is the best way in the world to get choke slammed. Now keep in mind, I myself didn't do this but outside of a bar on Thursday night, I was witness to someone yelling this as he got taken to the ground. The kid was either so drunk or so hopped up on adrenaline, that when they started tasing him, he shrugged it off and yelled, "ITS FEELS GOOD! YOU'RE A BUNCH OF BITCHES!" It was funny and sad in the fact that the guy was literally one step away from me on the sidewalk and I forgot to take a picture. It reminded me of the "Don't tase me bro!" but in reverse. And no, thats not me in the picture, but a strange facsimile.

2.) The Angus burger at McDonald's is fan-fucking-tastic. I know I've been on the recent health kick recently, but when I heard that they were starting to serve these here in the DC area, as they do in NYC, I was giddy. Go out and try one of these at least once.

3.) I know where the Real World house is now. Its true. I visited it in a drunken stupor and actually spoke with one of the cast members. I asked him, "Hey, is this the Real World house?" he looked at me sadly and nodded his head, almost as if he didn't originally know what he was getting into. Jungo knew though. Jungo always knew. Here's a picture of the house by the way, pretty damn nice.

4.) Dead Set is an amazing show about zombies that was made by the BBC. It was about six episodes long. Watch it when you get the chance.

5.) I don't know what the story is behind this picture, but I NEED to. The dog looks like his brain is about to shoot out of his nose.

6.) I need to stop writing Thor so damn much and start writing standup again. I have the problem of being too much of a perfectionist though. Current new material I'm working on:

The Stork, Sarah Palin joke (wow how original), Dad fights a bear, and about a zillion other things I have brewing in my head that need to be put on paper. I also need to just debut Archibald F Trousers already.

7.) I am so torn on whether or not I should see Transformers 2. Half the people I know say it is the worst movie ever made while the other half says it is awesome. You can see why I am torn.